The Smarter One

I discovered Noah can rhyme today.

Me: Let's read cat in the hat!
Noah: Cat and hat rhyme mommy.
Me: WHAT?!?! You know what rhyming is?!
Noah: Yeah
Me: Does dog and frog rhyme?
Noah: Yeah!
Me: Does feet and broccoli rhyme?
Noah: No
Me: WHO TAUGHT YOU HOW TO RHYME?
Noah [points at me]
Me: No I didn't!
Me: Wow, I think you're smarter than Judah. Shhhh, don't tell him.

Us Now

OMG this blog post is LONG overdue!

Cuz let's be real...I haven't written a "real" blog post in months (those little short conversation snippets don't count for nothin')

So there's no way to do this except for a quick and dirty...

It's everyone's favorite - Bullet Update Time!

'Sup with Judah:

• For the last 4-5 weeks Judah has been deathly afraid of sleeping at night. He's afraid to close his eyes, afraid of the dark, and afraid of bad dreams. Every night he prays that God will protect him from (and I quote) goblins, zombies, ghosts, and skeletons - yes those and those only. This all started when our neighbor (9 year old boy) told Judah all about zombies and how Noah might turn into a zombie at night. Ever since then Judah has been asking me to fervently pray for him each night. At first he asked to be prayed for 3 times a night. And then a week later he upped it to 4 times a night. And then in a few days, it was 5 times a night. And now, I'm happy to share that I am asked to pray for him 10x a night, but it seems to be capped at that good and fullsome number. All this means that one parent has to be with Judah at ALL TIMES until his eyelids get so heavy with sleep they force him to do the one thing on earth he fights with all his might - go to sleep. We are not amused.

• Judah has been going through a very sweet phase. He often says the most flattering things to me - Mommy, you're so beautiful. You're more beautiful than all the princesses in the world. Mommy, you're so stylish (I know, so weird because all I wear are sweatpants and ratty flannels, seriously). Mommy, your smile makes my heart warm like the sun. (awwwww). And my favorite quote from him - Mommy, you're more beautiful than an angel. Not really though. You're not more beautiful than an angel. That's just an expression.

• Just last week Judah has gotten into legos. YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS. Did you hear that? That's the sound of my heart leaping for joy and doing the happy dance. I was told this happens around age 5 and *bing!* right on cue - finally, it's happened to me, right in front of my face and I just can not hide it. I envision countless hours of Judah completely immersed in his technicolor brick world while I lounge leisurely on a couch and read a WHOLE ENTIRE PARAGRAPH without interruption. Unless Noah's around, darn it.

'Sup with Noah:

Update on Noah - still cute!

• Noah remains the cutest thing since sliced bread.

• Noah is slowly loosing his pot belly. Sad face.

• Noah is still nursing (solely for comfort cuz remember, I'm all dried up).

• Noah likes to tell me - Mommy, you have big nipples! (especially in a room full of quiet people. And no, I really don't. I think he just means in comparison to the other people in our family).

• Noah is completely offended if anyone refers to him as a baby. "I not baby! I big boy! Mommy, he call me a baby! I NOT BABY!!!!!"

• Noah talks A LOT but no one understands what he's saying. And most of the time it sounds like he's on some acid trip. Recently heard in the car - Mommy, I ride in the sun boat. And you not there. Judah not there. Daddy not there. But a cow in the sun boat. And a sun man in the sun boat. (rinse and repeat for 15 minutes. Seriously).

'Sup with the Spouse:

Update on Spouse - more "quality" time with the kids.

• He remains a devoted, loving, and long-suffering husband and father. Who visibly wilts after spending just 30 minutes with the kids. The man has good intentions though.

• We're looking forward to his 3 month sabbatical from work starting in June! This will be the first giant chunk of free time he's had since the kids were born and he's actually really excited to be more involved in their day to day lives. My tasks for him to accomplish on the sabbatical - teach Judah how to wipe his own butt and how to pee standing up without wetting his pulled-down pants. Exciting plans!

'Sup with me:

Update on me - still alive, but barely!

• I've been toying with the idea of going back to work. It's hard to find a job that lets me feel professionally satisfied AND allows me to work only 5-15 hours a week, but I think doing something in trusts and estates might do the trick. All I know is I genuinely, truly miss work. And the days I'm with the kids all day by myself are the absolute worst. I was never cut out to be with the kids all day every day and now, after scarring myself and them for 2 years - I've learned that! Yay self-awareness. Sarcastic face.

• This Summer we are FINALLY upgrading to a smartphone. Yes, we are the last people on earth with dumb phones - who aren't grandparents. To be honest, I've always hated the idea of being "connected" all the time. And I've been scared. Like totally freaked out, holy fear scared that I'll lose my ability to be bored for long periods of time if I have a smartphone. I think feeling sad and bored is a discipline and a great gift. And kind of impossible if you're always just a swipe away from every form of electronic entertainment imaginable. But what can you do. Progress marches on.

My Pleasure

Now that Judah has lost all his baby-ness, I'm realizing how quickly this hard early phase disappears. And I'm pretty sure the thing I'll miss most is his voice - the mispronunciations, the cute made-up and almost correct but not quite phrases, the way "purple Hershey's kiss" sounds like "puh-pull huh-see kiss."

Currently, I'm enjoying Judah mangling up the phrase "your pleasure." As in...

Me: Judah, thank you so much for drawing this beautiful picture for me!

Judah: [beaming] Your pleasure!

What a charming conflation of "you're welcome" and "my pleasure."

Completely unrelated picture of Judah wearing a "diaper hat" - your pleasure.

And yes, I refuse to correct him because it is my pleasure.