Travelblogue: Week 9 of 13: The Gadfly

Monday, July 9: My Gadfly

Today I met an abrasive old man that blatantly challenged my life choices. Socrates, anyone?

I was standing in the casual carpool line, minding my own business, when this hold-over from the hippie activist era starts talking to me. And before you know it it's:

"You know, I was an HLS grad too, back in '67. I used to do sit-ins in the South. I hate George Bush and his cronies. This country's going to shit. I'm a lawyer for poor people and civil liberties. You shouldn't work for a corporate firm. That's for greedy, soul-less sell-outs. I pay my summer intern $15 an hour. And they do real, purposeful, IMPORTANT work, not like you pencil-pushing slaves to the Man."

I looked at his beat-up briefcase with frayed corners, his low-rent clothes, his smug expression of contempt, and was quite dismayed when we happend to share the same car to work.

Tuesday, July 10: A World of Judgment

Today I went to, what felt like, a roomful of judgment.

I attended one of the many fundraising meals that big law firms sponsers to support legal defense funds for the indigent, battered, and generally dispossesed.

The cynic would say: this is how Biglaw market themselves to new recurits as kind and caring.

The optimist would say: this is how Biglaw shows that it can be kind and caring.

The one steeped in a guilt-based western religion would say: this is how Biglaw purges its guilty conscience from its seven-figure salaries and pencil-pushing slavery to the Man when it should be devoting itself to defending the poor and powerless.

Usually this kind of event wouldn't cause any introspection on my part, but then who should show up, but my own personal Gadfly! How did he find me in a roomful of over 500 stuffy suits?

Then came the predictable barrage of disparagements:

"Don't you wish you were doing this kind of work for the poor and oppressed? You rode a taxi here? My gosh you have money to burn! It's only a 20 minute walk. I guess you need to go back to your "important" work now (dripping with sarcasm)."

If ever I felt like an acolyte of a guilt-based western religion, it was today.

Thursday, July 12: We've got to stop meeting like this.

I went to a reception thrown by the local bar association for Judges. It's a meet-and-greet, press-the-judge's-flesh kind of mingle with big and small law firms alike.

Guess who I saw again? Yeah.

So he insists that I set up a lunch meeting with him next week and I'm too tired to fight it. Maybe he'll say something interesting. Maybe he'll just stoke the fire of guilt some more. And maybe I'll rethink my whole life.

Postscript:

It would be easy for me to dismiss this man. It would be easy to justify any job as fulfilling the cultural mandate to subdue the earth in some regard. Each worker, in his own fashion, is making some order out of chaos.

It would be easy to dismiss the large checks as merely a hazard that "comes with the territory." And as we can all recite, it's not money that is evil, but the "love of money," aka greed.

But what is not easy to dismiss is my own fear of poverty, my strong desire for secuirty, and the fact that everyone's standards of what is "moderate living" is only relative.

I should also say that I wish never to arrogate myself as judge over those who may choose what the Gadfly disapproves of. Who am I to say who is good and who is evil, or even what is good and what is evil? The heart of man is a nasty labyrinth. His true motives, who can know?

Travelblogue: Week 8 of 13: July Fly By

Sunday, July 1: Not Memorable

Monday, July 2: Not Memorable

Tuesday, July 3: Very Memorable

Today the firm went to CIRCUS SCHOOL!!!!!

That's right, I said CIRCUS school. Not clown school, that's different. But it was terrifying in another way...the trapeze.

First I saw the teacher on the trapeze and thought: Hell no, I'm not doing that.

Then they put a big harness belt on us. Tres chic, no?


I was shaking like a leaf, climbing up the 30 foot ladder.



Hands out, grab the bar.


Get ready to go...(They had to shout "Go!" at me three times before my leaden legs found the strength to jump off the platform).


And here I am, trying to swing my legs onto the bar so that I can...


let go of the bar and swing from my legs only!


So relieved to hit the net.


It was thrilling, and by thrilling, I mean terrifying. I want to do it again! Kind of...

July 4th: A Living National Monument

Spent the day with fam, hiking in Muir Woods, the only living national monument.


The misty shade of giant redwoods shielded us from the heat wave...


and made me feel like a child, lost in a land of wonder.


Brother lead the way...


Mom and Dad followed...


and stopped to pose for kodak moments,


while Brother studied the map.



And then we stopped by the gorgeous California coast line. Because we can. Because it's California: the best place in the world to live.


Thursday, July 5: Working hard to finish a memo due tomorrow.

Friday, July 6: Working hard to finish a memo due today.
Didn't finish!

Saturday, July 7: The Luckiest Day in the Year

Today I planned a Girl's Day Out in the City with Mom to celebrate her birthday.


First we went to get massages here:


Then had a swanky lunch here:



And then "shopped" at high-end stores (and by shop, I mean browsed and laughed at who would pay $120 for a shirt at Saks when the same thing at Ross would be $12.99).


Today marks the first time in our lives that I treated my mom to eat and recreate. Before I was too cash-strapped to even foot part of a bill from a greasy Chinese joint. But now, I have arrived: full-fledged adulthood.

Sunday, July 8: Self-imposed Deadline

I went into work today to finish the memo I couldn't finish on Friday. It felt good to finally get it done and not have to ask for yet another extension (which I've done at least twice for each assignment so far!). Yikes.

Blogistically Correct

Blogs are getting boring, including my own.

No one says anything remotely eye-brow raising. Everything's so carefully edited.

There's nothing juicy, nothing racy, nothing even racist or controversial.

That's why I love celebrity-bashing blogs.

News FLASH

And yes, I mean a literal flash.

As I descended the steps to the subway terminal I glanced at the girl in front of me. Did I see, oh my, what? Yes. Indeed. A nipple.

I stared at the girl in Southeast Asian costume jewelry and a long skirt. She was clearly decked out in some cultural performance costume. And she was bare-breasted.

Yes.

There she was. Lovely and dark and descending the steps of the Embarcadero subway station in Downtown San Francisco. Topless.

If I weren't rushing off to catch a train I would've followed her around to look at other people's reactions. For the 5 seconds she was in my sight I didn't notice any gawking or dropped jaws. And I think that shocked me most of all: that no one seemed to notice.

Travelblogue Week 7 of 13: Over the Hump

Sunday, June 24: Feeding Frenzy

Had lunch with the George's with food from a charming French Bistro, a delicious wine courtesy of Stephen, and brought it back to their sunny terrace to enjoy. All that food you see is mine: salad, french fries, steak sandwich, and the BEST of all, a warm crispy puff pastry filled with apricot.


After lunch I swore I could not eat for at least 12 hours. But then I had a delightful bakery date with Tammy and could not resist the various types of chocolate cupcakes from Love at First Bite.


It was more like pain at first bite: delicious but painful when already stuffed beyond capacity. And yes, after 7 weeks of this I have gained a LOT of weight.

Monday, June 25: The usual

I'm getting more and more brazen at work. Today I took an unprecedented TWO naps at my desk, one before lunch and one after.

Tuesdsay, June 26: Go Giants.

Went to a Giants game after work to watch them play the Padres. I don't know the first thing about baseball and could care less about the game. But I figure it would be nice to see the inside of a luxury box, get some free chili dogs and beer, and chew the fat for a while.


I went home before the fifth inning, stuffed. Again. Did I mention I'm gaining weight?

Wednesday, June 27: Out of control

My napping is getting out of control. I sat in on a conference call today with a partner and an associate. As they went through the finer points of a fifty page purchase agreement I caught myself nodding off. Right in front of the partner! Very bad form.

Thursday, June 28: Tightening the screws

I really need to get a memo done by Monday but all the napping has really taken a toll on my productivity. I drank three cups of coffee throughout the day to try to combat the soporific effect of legalese and over-eating.

Friday, June 29: Goodbye, we hardly knew ya'

One of the six Summers left today. We all felt sad to see him go since he's a genuinely great guy. And I felt a twinge of jealousy as he left with an offer in his pocket. I wish that were me.

Saturday, June 30: Notorious T.O.T.


This little guy is a playa' for real. He loves the ladies, loves the bling (kept fingering my gold watch, ring, and earrings), and like most playa's, he's got a monkey on his back (but this one is a literal monkey backpack/harness with leash).


Had dinner with him and his parents...


and afterwards he showed me his crib, literally.

Travelblogue: Week 6 of 13

Monday, June 18th: Back to work

I never thought I'd say this, but it was great to be back. After hell-week my quiet office stocked with snacks and water seems like a haven of rest and quiet. I almost forget I'm at work until I get my next assignment late in the day.

My next case is Wilma Jones (name changed for confidentiality). We're trying to reduce her murder sentence by pleading a defense built around domestic violence. Her life story comes straight out of some hard-journalistic documentary on crack-addicts, welfare moms, and abusive men. I'm thrilled to work on Wilma's case, not because I particularly care about her, but because I find criminal law fascinating.

Tuesday, June 19th: Hi-ho, hi-ho

For the first time in many years I actually look forward to going to work in the mornings. Crim law rocks. Spent all day reading about domestic violence theories of defenses and sordid tales of abuse and dysfunction. Kind of hits too close to home and causes some introspection on my part. Hmmm, this explains a lot...

Went to the beautiful home of one of the partners for dinner and a cooking class. We all donned blue aprons from the Hands-on Gourmet before making various parts of our meal: sushi, pulled-mozarella salad, crab cakes, tandoori chicken, and rasberry filled donuts.


Frankly there was a lot of standing around and drinking while the Hands-on staff did all the cooking as we watched on. Ha! But I was glad to finally learn how to make sushi after all these years of enjoying it.

Wednesday, June 20th: More "work"

Had another fun day researching domestic violence stuff. Had an awkward lunch with two older partners who are pretty quiet. Think: crickets chirping for two hours with occasional awkward phrases. Keep head down, chew, smile, sip some water.

Thursday, June 21st: Wilma, I hardly knew ya'

Today I was told to put the Wilma case away while I worked on a more pressing issue for a corporate client. I don't mind, but the Wilma stuff was just getting good! I hope Wilma's case is still waiting for me when I finish with this new assignment.

Friday, June 22nd: Don't remember.

I can't recall anything worth noting about today...

Saturday, June 23rd: Napa Trip

Today my firm rented a mini-bus and took about 12 of us on an all day wine-tasting excursion in Napa, where else?



Our first stop was Neal Vineyards, owned by Mr. Neal who is a wine FANATIC. The man makes his wine for pleasure, not for profit and subsidizes his operations with funds from other commercial transactions. If you ever want QUALITY cabernets and zinfandels, think Neal. He spares no expense.




Then we had some good ol' fashioned "American" food at Taylor's. I don't know why my coworkers were surprised that I chowed down on a huge cheeseburger. Somehow people always assume I'm vegetarian. They could not be MORE wrong.


Next we went to Merryvale for a fun food-wine pairing experiment in the cavernous Beauty-and-the-beast-like cask room. I wish I had my wedding reception here (instead it was in a student rec room, yuck!) I'm already thinking, Anniversary Dinner...?


We paired cheeses, salt, lemons, and chocolate with various wines to see how they affected each other. I'll be the first to admit, my taste buds are not discriminating. I just enjoyed chowing down on the cheese and chocolate.


Lastly we visited a small winery that focuses on mixing wines together. I was all "wined out" and just sipped water and played some croquet!






I won two for two! And yes, I cheated some.

Travelblogue: The Lost Week

Saturday, June 9: The kindness of strangers

You are never so helpless than when you are at the end of a 99 person line that won't move. And your plane is taking off in 30 minutes.

I can't tell you how many times I relied on the mercy and kindness of strangers during this most horrendous of days, trying to board the first flight to Boston, being told one thing by the fat man behind the United Airways counter and then being told another by the cranky black woman behind the Delta counter.

"You're not on this flight."

What?! But the man at United Airways told me I was?! Are you saying I dragged my ass down here at 4am this morning for nothing?! And there was no reason for me to stand in line for an hour?!

That's when I realized that standing in line is for sissies. Desparate times call for desparate measures. I became a serial cutter.

I used the short first-class lines despite my economy-class status. I sought out the single, middle-aged man at the front of lines, put on my most desperate girl-in-distress look, and played on that sense of comic-book heroism that makes every boy want to be a fireman at some point in his life: I'm so sorry, but my flight was cancelled last night and I'm supposed to be on this flight that boards in 15 minutes, would you mind if I cut in here? Sorry, sorry, thank you, thank you, thank you soooo much.

Finally, the cramped plane touched down in Boston at 11:30am. I went directly to my workshop training that had started without me, looking and feeling like dog poop.

Sunday, June 10: Recovering

Had another workshop training session today. Finally had time to relax for about 3 hours that evening. Unfortunately 2 of those "free hours" was spent preparing for my very first day of TA-ing, tomorrow.

Here's team Summer 2007 Negotiation Workshop TA Staff:

Monday, June 11: What?!

Today was a blur of activity. The Negotiation Workshop has lawyers, diplomats, and business professionals from all over the world. In my class alone there were 3 people from Brazil, one from Denmark, two from Australia, one from South Korea, one from China, one from Portugal, and even one from the great nation of Canada.

The 16 students in my class ranged in age from late twenties, to late fifties, and all of them made me wonder what the heck I was doing in front of the class when they had more experience and expertise about negotiation in each of their pinkies than I had in my whole body.

Here's me at a cocktail reception wearing my uniform de riguer for the week:



Tuesday, June 12: Just shoot me now

The stamina required for the workshop is herculean. It's an all day summer-camp logistical nightmare. Hand out this simulation packet now, take names for another simulation the next day, review the case using two exercises, make sure a class list is distributed, etc. And that's just the morning.

The workshop is all day, 8am-5pm and then the teaching staff reviews from 5pm-8pm. And then yours truly goes home and collapses in front of the TV for an hour while the technicolor commercials wash over me like intense light-therapy waves. And then I prep for a few hours and then it's straight to bed.

Wednesday, June 13: I hate her

There is a woman in my class who hates me.

Since the first time I looked into her beady little eyes, I knew she was going to be a troublemaker. And you know what? She was. She was rude, disrespectful, talked over me when I addressed the class.

In retrospect I should have firmly told her to raise her hand if she wants to talk, otherwise, be quiet! But at the time I just meekly watched her destroy my authority and credibility with the class and wondered again: what am I doing here?

Thursday, June 14: Exhaustion

More of the same. I wish my supervisors would say encouraging things to me to bouy my flagging spirit but they are tight lipped with the praise. One of them gave me feedback and said what sounded to me like some back-handed compliment: You have good potential.

Let me tell you the subtext of that evaluation: You suck right now.

Friday, June 15: I hate everyone

Tired. Insulted. Plucked of authority. Sad to leave Michael after barely seeing him this week. If I were a flavor of Lay's Potato chips, it would be Salt and Vinegar, except replace salt with piss.

Saturday, June 16: Retail Therapy

Shopped to my little heart's content. Bought a jacket, two pairs of khakis, and a black work blouse. The khakis were 50% off which makes me beam even now when I think about it. They are so essential in the "smart casual" work environment of a SF law firm.

Sunday, June 17: Back to the Bay

Reluctantly boarded a plane back to California, and had a layover at the Dallas/Fort Worth airport. I was extremely impressed by DFW.

Shiny, clean, new. It boasted several namebrand shops: L'Occitaine, Mont Blanc, Fossil, Brookstone, etc. The billboards said: the DFW terminal is larger than Manhattan. What?! I kind of believe it. There was a Grand Hyatt attached directly to the terminal. Imagine that! You don't even have to leave the airport to get to your hotel room!!!! That's convenience!

It was father's day so I hopped right off the plane to join the fam for dinner at a restaurant literally one block away from the house I grew up in. This humble house was my abode from age 6 to 19 and it felt wierd to revisit it. (My bedroom had the window on the right).



As my mom snapped this picture of me, the current dwellers rushed outside and demanded to know what the heck we were doing in front of their house. My mom explained that we used to live here and said something about how the house blesses the residents with good fortune (she definitely let slip the H-bomb).

Leave it to my mom to be superstitous, superficial, AND superfluous, all in one breath!

Travelblogue: Week 4 of 13

Monday, June 4th: Blah
Worked on memo due in two days.

Tuesday, June 5th: Blah
Worked on memo due in one day.

Wednesday, June 6th: Exhale
Turned in memo at 6:53pm. Phew.

Thursday, June 7th: Jetsetting
Flew to DC on the company dime to attend a weekend firm "indoctrination" conference at firm headquarters in DC. Took JetBlue and remembered why I love it so much as I munched on Terra Blue Chips and toggled between HGTV, FoodNetwork, and Comedy Central. Coast-to-coast never seemed less painful.

Stayed at the posh Mandarin Oriental Hotel in DC. My room was more than enough for little ol' me.

The bathroom was my favorite: stocked with exotic-smelling goodies and plush turkish robes. But the best part? The cleanest bathroom you will ever see on God's green earth (not even a single smidge on the grout in between tiles!) and a showerhead with water pressure so strong you could swear little elves are pummeling you. Ahhhh.



Friday, June 8th: Jetsetting part II
Had an 8-hour indoctrination session at the firm. It wasn't so bad. There was at least some humor sprinkled in between the usual rhetoric about excellence, diversity, growth, etc.

At precisely 7:49 pm that night disaster struck. I was waiting to board a flight to take me back to Boston, back to Michael, and on to a week-long intensive workshop at the law school and that's when it happened.

A disembodied voice came over the speakers and informed us our flight--MY FLIGHT! My long-awaited and greedily anticipated flight--had been delayed for two hours.

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.

This meant that by the time I would get home, it would be near 1am, which meant I would have to go straight to sleep so I wouldn't miss my training orientation bright and early Saturday morning. This meant no talking, luxuriating, and general relaxing with Michael. NO NO NO. This is NOT how it was supposed to be. This was the only time I could spend with Michael before the workshop consumed my life for the next 7 days, after which I would be hopping on a plane back to SF. Argh!

I pouted for a long time and questioned my faith in God. How could He send a storm that delayed my plane?! How could He do this to me! Of all times and places! Sure 8 year old girls are being sold into prostitution every day and war torn villages face deprivation and pillaging from savage rebel soldiers...but THIS, this was wrong!

And then it seemed like God answered my cries.

A lady came up to me and asked if I was waiting for the delayed flight to Boston. Yes, I replied, I was. She said, me too, you know they just announced that it was cancelled. WHAT?! CANCELLED?!

Yeah, she said, I know, sucks.

SUCKS?! You have NO idea. I immediately dragged myself to the service counter to confirm this stranger's bad tidings, feverishly praying that she was mistaken.

The pot-bellied attendant in front of the all-powerful computer monitor punched in a few codes and dryly confirmed my worst fears. For the first time in over a year I felt an overwhelming urge to cry.

These days...

...I've been watching a lot of Ugly Betty.
It's the corny show I didn't want to like but now can't help falling in love with. I think it's kind of irresistable because the characters are refreshingly multi-dimensional while still fulfilling their stereotypical roles. Willhelmina is a cold-hearted snake but has a soft spot for her assistant. Daniel is a playboy lothario but also has enough real vulnerabilities to garner my sympathy. And Betty. Along with her shining personality, she's bossy, plucky, annoying, self-righteous, and in short, a refreshingly real human being.

...I've been casual carpooling everyday.
Today was my nicest ride yet. By casual carpool standards, you could say it was pretty pimped out. Lexus. Leather seats. Nice Asian car freshener smell. The driver was a young Asian girl with blonde highlights who got fed up with the constant commercials on the local hip-hop station and played her own smooth-sexy-sounds mixtape. The crooner sang in a Justin Timberlake-style falsetto for all the songs and it was seductive.

...I've been working on my first official work product.
The first assignment of the Summer for me is a memo that has taken a full 3 weeks for me to write. That's pretty bad considering most people finish their first assignment in a week or less. Oh well. Whatever. It's hard to get work done when you're in the office for just 7 hours and you have 2 hour lunches!

...I've been eating a lot.
I was raised on frugality. You order from the dollar menu and your beverage is always tap water. So it's been really wierd to get a couple appetizers, 20 dollar entrees, different wine pairings with each dish, and of course dessert with each meal on a regular basis. I feel like a total profligate. But it gets "better". I go home on the weekends and my mother cooks mountains of food for me and stuffs me from sun up to sun down. Freshly squeezed grape juice, noodle soups, freshly baked cornbread, roasted pork, etc. I'm so up to my eyeballs in food! Ugh. Someone cut me out of my pants.

Travelblogue: Week 3 of 13

Monday: Memorial Day

The family went to Berkeley's delightful Botanical Gardens for the day to sample their horticultural delights.



Here's brother and me at the Redwood Grove - a lovely area completely swathed in the shadow of magnificent Redwoods.





Here is a Monet-esque scene in this magical grove:



And then we entered the wonderful and wacky world of cacti. There were so many bizarre looking cacti in the greenhouse I need to devote an entire separate post to these otherworldly creatures at some later time. But here's a teaser to give you a hint of their freakiness: It's a masquerade cactus!



Tuesday: Regular
Went to work a little earlier today and managed to get in 8 hours! Woohoo. Not much else to report... The highlight of my day was going to Target and buying toiletries. The local Target is luxe! It's two stories and has a companion escalator for your shopping cart.

Wednesday: !Fiesta!
After work the firm threw a little fiesta party (for fun I guess). We did shots, ate quesadillas, and people were clearly tipsy towards the end.



Thursday: Italian Seafood
After work Stephen, Emily, and I went to this cute Italian place for dinner. This picture doesn't really do justice to the romantic setting. I felt like Lady and the Tramp could have an anniversary dinner here. I love dining with Stephen because he picks the best wines.



Friday: Real Work
So I have my first real assignment and deadline due next Tuesday. It will be a "memo." I'm a little nervous about handing in something concrete. Real work product, not just me b.s.ing about what I think I've found in vague research. Eek.

Went home to see parents and played ping-pong all night. Then we played Hearts and I unwittingly shot the moon!

Saturday: Best in Hair
Got a haircut which I LUUUUUV. I did have to ask twice for it though (after the lady was done I said I didn't like it and she re-touched it in some places). I felt bad about that, but it sure paid off!

Went bargain shopping with mom. I will only go bargain shopping with someone else whose judgement I trust. Otherwise I end up taking home a lot of crap because "it was cheap" and I'm hungry and disoriented. I ended up, among other things, with the best pair of jeans I've ever owned at an unheard of price: under $15. I was willing to pay $100.

Badminton with the 'rents and kronies. They kicked my ass as always, but I'm improving!