Brother and Brother

Judah's car song:

Brother and brother
We're BFFs
We're BFFs

Brother and brother
We're BFFs
We're BFFs

When Noah is sad
I comfort him
And when I'm sad
He does the same for me too

We're BFFs
Best friends for life!

I have always given Judah a lot of credit for establishing the good rapport the kids have with each other. I think the oldest child sets the tenor of the whole relationship - is it nurturing? Is it competitive? Is there generosity?

And because Judah, by temperament, hates to see other people suffer, he has always chosen to satisfy Noah's needs ahead of his own. NOT because Judah is a saint but because, as Judah puts it, "It gives me a headache when Noah cries. It makes me feel so bad, mommy." I think he's like me - extremely conflict avoidant.

So even when Judah was only 2 and half, and desperately wanted some huggle snuggle time with me, he would forgo it because Noah cried the second I put him down to make room for hugging Judah.

But recently, I realized Noah should get quite a bit of credit for their brotherly love. He worships Judah like a hero. He thinks of his brother often. When he gets a treat or a goodie bag at school he always makes it a point to share it with Judah. But this is the part that really blows me away.

Noah doesn't just share his treats with Judah, he insists that Judah get the bigger part of it "because Judah is bigger than me, mommy."

Noah, though being in very nature like Judah, does not consider equality with Judah something to be grasped. Okay, sorry, that was just me messing with the Bible.

But seriously, it is Noah's extremely high esteem of Judah that also keeps the relationship train running smoothly. He always gives Judah the best seat, figuratively and literally at times, and that really satisfies Judah's need to feel superior to his brother.

Yes they are selfish little monsters. Yes they are greedy little grabbers. Yes they fight and bicker and argue and whine. But somehow it just works...so far...