Saturday, May 04, 2013

And What the Police Gonna Say?

For the last 2-3 months Judah has been obsessed with being a policeman.

 He refuses to wear anything that isn't blue because he wants to always be in "uniform."  He especially loves the "police" t-shirt in the picture so much that I finally just bought 2 more so we could avoid the inevitable epic meltdowns when the shirt had to be washed.  (If you look closely at my last few blog entries, you can see this shirt in almost every pic of Judah).

Judah imagines he's being a good policeman by helping wash dishes.

But dressing like a policeman is not good enough for Judah anymore.

Now he wants to know every aspect of their lives and whether his life comports with that.  Almost everything I say to him is followed by a question about police.

For example, I'll say, "Do you need to go potty?"
And Judah responds, "Do police go potty?"

Or I'll put some mac 'n' cheese in front of him and he asks, "Do police eat mac 'n' cheese?"
He still hasn't realized the uncanny coincidence that the police love eating everything that mommy has happened to put in front of him--especially turkey and broccoli.

But by far the most annoying thing is Judah's need to gauge how a policeman would respond to any given situation.  About 500x a day Judah wants to know "What the police gonna say?"

For example, I'll say "Listen to mommy or you're going to get a time out."  And Judah will say "And what the police gonna say to me?"

I usually just turn it into a kind of morality tale--"Umm, the police are going to say--you better listen to your mommy or else you're going to jail."

But other times, it's just so random.  Today I said "You love eating mangoes!" after watching him inhale several mango pieces.  And Judah said "And what the police gonna say?"

What?  The police don't give a rat's butt about how you love eating mangoes.  Weirdo.

Instead, I mumbled something about how eating mangoes will make you stronger so you can catch the robbers.

That's what my life has become--a constant attempt to imagine what the police are going to say to my 2 year old in any given situation.


Ezra said...

I worry about the day Judah realizes we are all the bad guys. Or maybe I don't

CP said...

Oh my gosh, this is totally hilarious!!! "What the police gonna say?" I love it!

A lot of kids I know are obsessed with firefighters. I personally perfer the policeman as my man in uniform :)

Attorney at Large said...

Pea has been demanding to know about bad guys (we have to drive past a juvenile detention facility on our way to the grocery store -- nice) and what constitutes a bad guy. For a while there, she was convinced any disobedience could get her sent to the facility. I'll admit, it was a kind of nice, quiet time. :) Maybe Judah can straighten her out on that!

Alice in Wonderland said...

Ezra--That will be a sobering day for Judah...when he realizes that their are crooked cops.

CP--You crack me up. I'll remember your police fetish if I ever have to organize a special event for you. ;-)

Att at Large--I have a hunch Pea will not be in the least bit intimidated by Judah and his faux uniform, ha ha.