She: Wow, you're pregnant! When are you due?
Me: In January!
She: Wow, that's still a ways off. You're huge! Are you having twins?
Me: [What I wanted to say] Wow, that's incredibly rude! You're soooo old and ancient-looking, you should know better. What are you, 75? 80? (In reality, she's probably just 60.)
Me: [What I actually said] Um, nope, just one baby!
But kinda makes me wonder, do I really look that big? You be the judge...
|Me and my giant middle.|